Invisibules

1. Frightened by an especially acerbic lemon at the age of 3...
[Lemon: can't you just play with GUNS like any normal child?] fizz!
Boy stuff

2. ...Jimmy Jones /metamorphoses/:
goes on a cordon-bleu course during the summer holidays;
studies hotel management at one of the more vocational universities;
pays off his student loan and becomes...

3. Avocado Man!
zzzzzz
RIPEN AT HOME

4. ...pledged to keep avocado-based nutrition on the agenda throughout North London and the home counties. Now READ ON...
(Nigel: Jocasta! We've got carrot sticks left, but there's no hummus!)
(Jocasta: *#!%!)

5. (Jocasta: But M&S will be closed in five minutes - so it's too late to send Maria out for more in the 4x4)
WHAT CAN WE DO?