One for the word-play category…
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Pianist accompanies dancing class of dancers, all dressed in leotards. One dancer is wearing a leopard onesie suit. Thinks: "I wish I'd read the clothing instructions more carefully."
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Happy Hallowe’en to you. We were sitting in Broad Street in the sunshine today, next to the man drumming up support for the ghost tour of Oxford (which happens year-round, incidentally,) and this comic more-or-less drew itself. The colouring was supported by a slice of apricot and lavender cake at the Bodleian’s new café.
I wonder if ghosts find sunshine as spooky as humans find darkness?
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Ghost Tour of Oxford
I would like to thank my wonderful and surreal wife, Karen, for the wordplay that underpins this comic. I merely added the seahorses and coloured it in.
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It was just another tedious social function. But then, magically, across the crowded room, their lips met. [picture: fish at a party. Two seahorses kiss across the room using their long long snouts)]
Yesterday I took the day off work and we went into London to visit the Natural History Museum. Darwin says “Hi!”
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almost compleat stegosaurus. Arthur Pain collection. Tube Worms. Aragonite. Icthyosaur with babies. Brain coral. Umbrella-mouthed gulper. Deep sea gnosher (before feeding - after feeding) The blue whale is being serviced.
Another pleasant day at the zoo (with baby Greater One Horned Rhinoceros.)
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Advanced camera technique for wildlife photography - pan, tilt and zoom.
Naturally I prefer my definition to any that others may have coined. Thanks to Karen for help with selecting a suitable banana.
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Stealthie: when your phone takes your photo without your knowledge.
Apologies to non-UK readers who might not know what a punnet is.
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(Oh the embarrassment!)
[Why? What's happened?)
(I accidentally threw one of those plastic fruit punnets into landfill...)
(... instead of recycling!)
[Oh! Shame!]
(The council were very angry and sent me a form to fill in.)
[Oh! Horror!]
(Yes. And, I had to sign a declaration to confirm it was an accident.)
[What did it say?]
(No punnet intended.)
[Why? What's happened?)
(I accidentally threw one of those plastic fruit punnets into landfill...)
(... instead of recycling!)
[Oh! Shame!]
(The council were very angry and sent me a form to fill in.)
[Oh! Horror!]
(Yes. And, I had to sign a declaration to confirm it was an accident.)
[What did it say?]
(No punnet intended.)
Happy Birthday mum for the 14th!
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Birthday cake with quite a lot of trombone candles, perhaps 76 of them. Balloons, streamers etc. Icing text says "Happy Birthday -- enjoy your big parade". Secondary image shows ranks of military looking chaps in parade uniform. The leader is giving an order to an ice-cream van: "... and 103 cornets, please." The first cone is actually a brass cornet with ice cream in the top.
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[Winnie's Workshop -- Brooms Fettled, Cauldrons Lined, Spells Recast]
Winnie, the witch mechanic, receives a tool from her trainee:
"No you idiot! This is a phillips driver -- I need a HEX key!"
Winnie, the witch mechanic, receives a tool from her trainee:
"No you idiot! This is a phillips driver -- I need a HEX key!"
Thank you, Watson.
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[Sherlock Holmes puffs away, abstractedly.]
Dr. Watson: You sit there puffing your pipe
Pretending to reflect
But /I/ know it's all smoke and mirrors.
Dr. Watson: You sit there puffing your pipe
Pretending to reflect
But /I/ know it's all smoke and mirrors.